Last week a topic of conversation came to the dinner table. Why are so many of us are feeling unhappy? Apart from the obvious restriction on our freedom and too much Covid press, a deeper question arose, what does happiness mean to you?
We find ourselves striving to work to have more in our lives. Being influenced by social scenes and the media doesn’t deeply fulfill anyone. It only seems to add pressure to have and want in order to keep up with others. This doesn’t actually address the simple pleasures of what makes us happy or keeps us balanced.
Today we have so much more material wealth, well-being knowledge, and opportunities to fill the gaps and goals in our lives. Not only are we living longer with a better quality of life. Although some may disagree at this current time, so many of us feel a sense of defeat or struggle when it comes to our personal happiness.
Sure, some people are just naturally more prone to depression than others. According to one article by WHO over 300 million people worldwide battle depression each day.
Depression can stem from many different things it can run in your family or play a part in your brain chemistry. Your emotional wellbeing and hormones, the current state of mind, and environment are all factors of influence. Our thoughts, personality type, and lifestyle all affect our risk. Keeping a positive, active lifestyle, healthy diet and mindset can all help reduce depression.
What Does Happiness Mean to You?
Happiness comes in many forms. But the most important aspect is that happiness is something that cannot be brought. Well maybe temporarily, but if you haven’t noticed that fades too. The good news is you can train yourself to be happy.
While we place so much pressure on ourselves to have it all; a successful career, happy relationship, house, kids, and so on, we forget what we really want. Falling into what society says you should have or what others have, doesn’t necessarily mean it will be the right choice for you.
These days we are so much more aware that happiness in material possessions wears off after a while. So, when you left to pay that new car off for the next few years, you question the value of your time.
The pressures that we place on ourselves to have our lives look a certain way brings about a certain struggle and defeated feeling when we are unable to reach these goals. Why do we do this to ourselves because we believe it will make us happy?
Maybe it will boost our confidence if we looked a certain way. If we kept up with the latest technology then it will portray a certain status and success. We all have various reasons for things, but ultimately how often do we stop to think about emotional fulfillment more than material wealth.
Happiness Isn’t Found in Things
Sometimes we hold on to things because of their security, maybe a relationship, or a horrible job just for the status. This can close the door to many other possibilities that may be better suited to us. When our minds overshadow our heart’s desires, our fears become more powerful. The trust that we have in ourselves, gets lost and we need to stop, look within, and really assess our gratification. Sometimes the simplest changes such as working less to enjoy more time with the family or learning to limit our expenses can provide so much more in return.
Probably one of the hardest things in life to achieve is to be in the flow of life, where we are not attached to anything. We accept that people, jobs, friendships, and lovers come in and out of our lives at different stages. Trying to hold on to these things makes us feel powerless and confused and that is because we are not meant to cling to things.
Have you heard the saying you are whole and complete on your own? Much harder to believe though, isn’t it?
Loving Thy Self Enough to Change
The importance of self-love and the relationship we have with ourselves goes without saying. Even though we are born with a love for ourselves as children, it doesn’t mean it sticks around in our adult lives. It is most likely that life experiences toughened us up which put doubts in our capabilities. The task then becomes about learning to declutter our thoughts about ourselves and realise the truth.
The Power of Positive Thinking
I know you know. But I’ll say it again. Learn to control your thinking and you’ll learn to program your mind for positivity. Can this make you happy? Well, it will definitely make you more attractive in the law of attraction. Once we are able to get a hold of our limited way of thinking and reset it to a more positive mindset, then it will start to change the way we feel.
What is Growth Mindset?
A growth mindset involves people improving their intelligence and ability to learn things, through hard work, and perseverance. It is about accepting and even welcoming failure as a means to move forward. Seeing it as a form of growth and development. It all relates to your attitude towards things.
Some simple examples of a growth mindset are; knowing it is never too late to learn, believing it to be okay if you fail first go at something, or appreciating constructive criticism.
Tips on How to Train Yourself to Be Happy
- Focus on what you have, not what you don’t have
- Surround yourself with uplifting people who appreciate you
- Look for opportunities in bad situations, what can you learn for next time
- Don’t pick at your flaws. We all have them, focus on what you can improve and what you love
- Encourage yourself to learn or try new things without the pressure
- List and focus on the things you are most grateful for each day
- Learn that everything is evolving and changing all the time and that negative feelings will come and go.
- Balance indoor time with outdoor time, fresh air, and sunshine.